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20 July 2008 @ 09:49 pm
Code 'Winchester', my first drabble  
The definition of a drabble being a short story executed in precisely one hundred words (excluding title), herewith find my very first ever drabble, prompted by discovering yesterday in my new issue of AOPA Pilot magazine a piece of aviation trivia:  the military aviation meaning of the codeword, "Winchester."

Hope you enjoy.

*************************************

Code 'Winchester'

“You got a scary name, man. A pilot says your name, means he’s dead empty:  no more bombs, no more missiles, no more bullets in his guns. ‘Expended all available ordnance’ – that’s what ‘Winchester’ means. Means you ain’t got nothin’ left, can’t even shoot back if someone jumps you on the way home. Scary.”
 
For the first time, he truly felt his name. He had no ammo left any more. Well – maybe just one final shot.
 
He looked at his son’s lax face, at the machines breathing for him; then he locked and loaded his soul, and silently said goodbye.


**************************************

 
 
Current Mood: melancholymelancholy
Current Music: "Dead Man Walking" by Bruce Springsteen
 
 
 
originalcindyr: BDW - Lonely Roadoriginalcindyr on July 21st, 2008 03:10 am (UTC)
Oh. My.

Professor.

Such a small piece with such a huge emotional impact!

I was taking a brief break and got the message this was here. Couldn't help myself in peeking. Now my heart ... hurts.

Your gift of words is so awesome. Thank you for sharing it.
bardicvoice: JohnThinker by <lj user=Cakehole_Cat>bardicvoice on July 21st, 2008 10:58 pm (UTC)
Sorry to hurt your heart, Keeper ... but sometimes, it just hurts so good, hey?

I'll have to drabble some more; it holds the same kind of attraction as writing haiku.
jdsgirlbevjdsgirlbev on July 21st, 2008 03:24 am (UTC)
Ow. Ow. Ow. Oh, and OW!! Exceptionally powerful. Brava.

bardicvoice: JohnThinker by <lj user=Cakehole_Cat>bardicvoice on July 21st, 2008 10:58 pm (UTC)
Thank you! I'm glad that it spoke to you, given your particular love for John!
bajadrmnbajadrmn on July 21st, 2008 03:28 am (UTC)
Just....WOW!
bardicvoice: JohnThinker by <lj user=Cakehole_Cat>bardicvoice on July 21st, 2008 10:59 pm (UTC)
Thank you!
whimsywinx: SN-HappyEndwhimsywinx on July 21st, 2008 03:31 am (UTC)
*sob* That was so good, Mary!
bardicvoice: JohnThinker by <lj user=Cakehole_Cat>bardicvoice on July 21st, 2008 11:00 pm (UTC)
Thank you! Guess it did what I intended, huh?
(no subject) - whimsywinx on July 21st, 2008 11:38 pm (UTC) (Expand)
Virtual Strumpet: SPN-Dean FTWglendaglamazon on July 21st, 2008 07:39 am (UTC)
Well. That is just a ridiculous quantity of awesome right there, is what that is!
bardicvoice: JohnThinker by <lj user=Cakehole_Cat>bardicvoice on July 21st, 2008 11:01 pm (UTC)
Thank you! I've discovered that writing to disciplined rules can be fun; I'll have to do more of this.
raputathebuta: Big Daddyraputathebuta on July 21st, 2008 01:09 pm (UTC)
Oh Mary! I think this is the first time a drabble ever made me cry. Amazing that such a stripped down story could break my heart (all over again).

Just wonderful! *pets BDW*

Edited at 2008-07-21 01:10 pm (UTC)
bardicvoice: JohnThinker by <lj user=Cakehole_Cat>bardicvoice on July 21st, 2008 11:03 pm (UTC)
Hanky, Rap? That's it - dab your eyes and blow your nose, okay?

Thanks for letting me know I achieved my purpose!
(Deleted comment)
bardicvoice: Palazilla by <lj user=janglyjewels>bardicvoice on July 21st, 2008 11:03 pm (UTC)
Thank you! I may need to try Impala drabbles this year ... *grin*
(Deleted comment)
Danipinkphoenix1985 on July 21st, 2008 07:57 pm (UTC)
great!
bardicvoice: JohnThinker by <lj user=Cakehole_Cat>bardicvoice on July 21st, 2008 11:04 pm (UTC)
Thanks!
zofia27zofia27 on July 21st, 2008 10:33 pm (UTC)
Oh wow. What a punch to the gut and with only 100 words!
bardicvoice: JohnThinker by <lj user=Cakehole_Cat>bardicvoice on July 21st, 2008 11:04 pm (UTC)
Thanks for letting me know it did what I wanted it to do!
panns: BDWpanns on July 22nd, 2008 04:14 am (UTC)
Awesome Mary. Really powerful.
bardicvoice: JohnThinker by <lj user=Cakehole_Cat>bardicvoice on July 23rd, 2008 12:34 am (UTC)
Thanks, panns! Think I'll be drabbling some more as time goes on ...
frogfrogd on July 22nd, 2008 12:54 pm (UTC)
That was awesome!
bardicvoice: JohnThinker by <lj user=Cakehole_Cat>bardicvoice on July 23rd, 2008 12:35 am (UTC)
Thank you! Glad you enjoyed it!
tabaqui: d&jpaletabaqui on July 22nd, 2008 02:15 pm (UTC)
Oh, very cool. I love the image of 'locked and loaded his soul'...

Oh, John.

And an awesome use of trivia! Must remember this.
:)
bardicvoice: JohnDean Hug by <lj user=Cakehole_Cat>bardicvoice on July 23rd, 2008 12:37 am (UTC)
Thank you! When I saw that trivia question, I nearly freaked ... then I read the answer, and said, "Oh, look - a bunny!"

Love your icon, by the way ... father and son!
(no subject) - tabaqui on July 23rd, 2008 10:33 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - bardicvoice on July 23rd, 2008 10:37 pm (UTC) (Expand)
cindy: spn - dean looks away (by oxoniensis)tsuki_no_bara on July 22nd, 2008 02:45 pm (UTC)
oooh. that's really, really good. short, sweet, to the point, very john. (and how appropriate is that codeword....)
bardicvoice: JohnThinker by <lj user=Cakehole_Cat>bardicvoice on July 23rd, 2008 12:38 am (UTC)
Thank you! That trivia question positively bred bunnies ... *grin*
redrikkiredrikki on July 22nd, 2008 10:31 pm (UTC)
Well, that's a neat factoid. I like how you tied it. For a first time drabble-er you've mastered the essential skill of boiling a complex story with rich emotions into just 100 words.
bardicvoice: JohnThinker by <lj user=Cakehole_Cat>bardicvoice on July 23rd, 2008 12:39 am (UTC)
Thank you! I got lots of practice writing haiku ... *grin*
iamstealthyoneiamstealthyone on July 22nd, 2008 10:42 pm (UTC)
Oh, John.

Nicely done.
bardicvoice: JohnThinker by <lj user=Cakehole_Cat>bardicvoice on July 23rd, 2008 12:39 am (UTC)
Thanks! I love Dad ...